Jersey Shore


I’m in a bad mood today. The dark cloud of trade winds is still hovering. It also happens to be the busiest day of the year in shipping and my day job is in shipping. Thus, I’m going to Fire Joe Morgan the shit out THIS.

Before I start, let me first note that I initially was going to title this post “Fire Joel Meyers,” but amid all of this hate and confusion, that brought me back to October 9th, 2009. Andrew and I bumped into Joel in the bowels of The Forum and he was the nicest guy ever. That was after we almost died at Forum Liquor. Mr. Meyers, you’re spared. The Lakers Nation is not. We shall begin.

The Jersey shore seems to be a popular destination for Jackson’ cast-off’s, where Sasha Vujacic will join another ex-Lakers guard, Jordan Farmar, on a 6-19 Nets squad.

Relating the Nets to Jersey Shore is so fucking tired. Not only is it stupid, but the Nets play in Newark. Newark is like two hours away from Seaside Heights. And yes, I  had to Wikipedia Jersey Shore (TV Series) to find out where it’s filmed.

According to several ESPN resources, the Lakers will receive veteran forward Joe Smith – who just celebrated his 91st birthday and will be playing for his 43rd NBA team – and the draft rights to Houston’s Sergei Lishchuk (or, as our own Kam Pashai suggests, just ‘Lish’). Additionally, the champs will give New Jersey their 2011, lottery protected, first-rounder and receive a pair of second-rounders in return.

Haaayoh. Old guy joke. Joe Smith played against real Raptors in a pre-downsizing NBA. Also, big ups to Kam Pashai on nickname duties. Aside from it all, I’m really enjoying the perceived notion that Lishchuk’s 6-11, 250 frame is going to help the Lakers. He was the 49th pick in 2004. His rights have been nothing but trade filler since then. GO LISH.

By all indications, the Nets are looking to re-boot the Machine right away.

Couldn’t have not gone there.

“We’re gonna need Sasha to play immediately. We need help at the combo guard spot. We’re gonna want him to play on the ball and off the ball and knock down some shots”, said Nets head coach, Avery Johnson.

Upon hearing about the proposed deal on Tuesday, Mr. Sharapova expressed some frustration about his diminished role on this Lakers team.

Mr. Sharapova.

“It’s terrible. I’m 26 years old. I played a few years [consistently] and the last couple years, playing on and off, it was just killing me. We’ll see, if it happens then I definitely want to double what I did in LA.”

I am not entirely sure how you can double next to nothing, but I am sure that all 700 Nets fans will be anxiously waiting…

Fuck you. It’s not even possible to accurately criticize this.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: